Luke Marsden: Filling time with a DIY dentist kit while having to play a waiting game!
You’ll have to forgive me for asking the next question but it has been swirling around in my mind for days now, where the hell have all the dentists gone?
I ask because on a “wholesome weekend” (as the Gen Z lot say) away in Penrith last week, my girlfriend began craving Kendal mint cake, as it was
a stone’s throw away (well actually 35 mins drive).
I obliged and off we went in search of the minty treat.
Ironically Kendal mint cake isn’t that easy to locate in Kendal but we persevered and eventually found some.
Back in Penrith I chomped down on the mint white slab and instantly realised I was also chewing on my own tooth.
My filling (which has only lasted 18 months) had been ripped.
Upon my return to Wigan I phoned my dentist to inform them of the now black hole that has formed inside of my mouth, their response was that I’d be looking at three weeks at the earliest for it to be fixed and if I were to be in any pain with it then an out of hours emergency dentist trip to Manchester was
the only option, alongside the corresponding cost attached.
I could fly to space quicker to see an actual black hole.
The “advice” I was given was to order a DIY filling kit from Amazon and “have a go yourself”.
I laughed at first thinking they were attempting to ease any dental discomfort with humour, turns out they were deadly serious.
So as I sit here and write this I’ve got what looks to be a larger clump of white chewing gum stuffed into the gap where my filling should be.
Do I now qualify as a dentist? I should start offering my gap filling services, I’d probably make a fortune in a climate where it’s easier to find Where’s Wally than a dentist appointment.
If you can’t sleep tonight, don’t google Covid DIY dentist horrors, you’ll probably not sleep for a week.
This backlog and lack of good customer service from dentists is a disgrace.
Turns out the £3 mint cake is going to cost me a lot more.