LUKE MARSDEN: returning to Britain and a snowstorm of fake news

The freezing part is easier to address, Wigan is baltic, the UK is turning into one of those awful snow scenes from a cheap Christmas card.

The moment I touched back down on Manchester’s runway (lucky it wasn’t a day later otherwise it would’ve been frozen shut) the captain announced that it was a cool minus four degrees. Minus four, when did we start plummeting to these depths?

As if the currently £9 a day I’m spending on heating my house isn’t bad enough, I’ve been the subject of my own snowstorm across the national press.

A story came out earlier this week that "Big Brother icons Luke and Bex reunite after 12 years” the article went onto document a two hour long phone call we had in which we laid our decade long differences aside and buried the hatchet.

This would be a wonderful, pre-Christmas feelgood story if it wasn’t for the fact that none of that happened.

I know I’m 35 years old now and my memory isn’t what it used to be but I would remember if I was speaking to my ex-girlfriend for the first time in 12 years for two solid hours.

The facts are this, we exchanged one Instagram message last summer after I was informed the dog we shared together had died. That’s the world exclusive, hold the front pages.

Piled on top of the fake news was the sad news that England won’t be in the World Cup anymore.

I fired off a few tweets last weekend about that and of course got involved in a Brexit argument with the scholars that are on the internet.

We live in a time where the truth is melting away quicker than the ice on my drive, but unless we start calling out facts as actual facts then we really are going to live in a land similar to the front of a Christmas card, people skating along in their existence with snowflakes everywhere.

I think this winter just got a lot colder, time to get that gas bill to break the £10 a day mark…